2023

Well, I really don't know what to say. This has been one of those years. My first year outside of high school wasn't really what I expected. What I thought would have been a year of academic growth, turned into personal growth, instead of spending my days at university, bettering myself. I worked full-time, instead of enjoying the twilight years of my youth. I was the most lonely I've ever been. In these last few moments of this year, I want to look back on it. 

This wasn't my best year, I admit that. I would say the overall average was low. Starting the year off strong, it quickly took a steep decline after quitting university. I felt that I failed, breathing myself up, and hating myself. I failed. Then came Kalgoorlie, working away changed me. It was probably that and quoting school. I wasn't talking to friends anymore, I think it was three months. Then coming back home, everything changed. If I look at posts from my old blog, around May to June they were dark. Like seriously, it makes me depressed looking at them. But something happened to me here that'll change me. I watched Makoto Shinkai's Suzume. I know people always say films change them, but this did. It set me down that path I'm on now. Lead me to Your Name, a film that changed how I view films. Something I hold near to my heart. To skip repeating myself, let's skip ahead to late June, to probably one of my favourite things ever, K-On!

I'll never forget watching K-On! for the first time. It's weird to look back on now. I was more confused than anything else. How were the same people who made Haruhi? I thought. It wasn't really my second watch I fell in love with it. The show carries such a feeling of confit. Like everything going to be alright. I don't have to think much, I can just feel. It's a show that hit me right when I needed it. Something I could just fall into, and forget about things. And right now, this year that's all I needed. 

Japan, what a palace. I'll write more later but it's so weird. So old, yet new. It smells like cigarettes and old cardboard. 

To be honest, I enjoyed last year more. But I think this year had higher highs and lower lows. I never hated myself more or enjoyed myself. To think I wasn't the same person I was this time last year, I wonder who I'll be this time next year. Guess I'll see.

See ya.